For Ameliadear amelia "i know you haven’t talked to me in a long time. i’m so sorry for not talking to you. i just couldn’t bring myself to talk to my friends because i was so busy wallowing in my pain and the trauma i experienced from my girlfriend. i can’t forget how much she tried to make me her little patsy. she thinks she can use me and treat me like shit, and not expect me to leave her. anyways, i just want to tell you, you ok bro? i saw the art you posted on myspace two days ago, and it scared me. why did you draw someone being brutally beaten? i know you turn to very violent games to cope with the sudden murder of your best friend, and your town is filled with violence, but the beaten up girl looks like you. i love you platonically and dont want you to do anything drastic. on a lighter note, may you please meet me at my apartment? i would really want to see you in person again, and i can show you the albums i just bought a week ago. also got this new ouija board!” sincerely, nicolas parker, 11/24/2005Blue Note / Solace LetterTo Neveah Sweetheart “I haven’t seen the sun in over two decades— Has it been twenty years, or has it been longer? Or shorter? For me, time is nothing anymore. Every second, every minute, every hour— they all blend in. One second I could find myself staring at the blood stain i’ve created by banging my head against the wall, and the very next second I would be curled up in the corner trying to recollect my memories before all of this happened. Before being forgotten in the highest floor in this purgatory, before being left to starve, before being beaten, chained, and thrown into this fucking cell— I could’ve changed the world with my inventions. Children around the world would’ve grown up to be exactly like me and change the lives of the newer generations for the better. What I did was for the greater good, someone was bound to do it eventually! I was bringing magic into people’s lives, even if we had to sacrifice just a few… Hundred… Liv— A few hundred thousand lives. But I stand by what I did, the overpopulation problem was ALREADY getting worse! I was simply leading humanity into a better future, shaping it into my personal perfect view of world peace. It would’ve been better that way, wouldn’t it? I thought everyone would love my ideas, I thought that nothing would get in my way, but you had to ruin my chances at fixing this miserable world. How do you feel, Neveah? Do you feel proud for locking me up? Do you feel proud for outright starving me almost to the point of DEATH?? Do you still think that you’re in the right here?? Let me tell you something. You can’t just keep someone locked up for dozens of years and not expect them to lose their mind, ESPECIALLY when the reason why you locked them up in the first place WAS because they were ‘insane.’ Do you know what that does to a person, Neveah? It distorts their mind. It makes them even crueler than they were before, being locked away for this long without anyone to talk to doesn’t magically make someone more sympathetic than when they first got in, oh, no no no. It turns them into a ruthless fucking murderer, that’s what. You think after being locked away for soo loonggg a person can maintain their dignity? Their empathy? The only thing that’ll grow is their thirst for revenge, once they get out of their cell they’re going right for your neck. That’s why you never let anyone out, isn’t it? Everyone here would’ve been better off if they were never sent here in the first place, but once they’re in that wretched straitjacket, it’s game over. Why do you keep doing this? Why do you keep thousands of people locked away from everyone they loved or cared about? Nobody here’s going to magically get better.. You know the definition of insanity, right? Doing the same thing over, and over, and over again and expecting something to change! It’s ironic, isn’t it? That’s the same thing you’re doing to the people you consider insane. You keep locking more people up and you just expect at least one of us to walk out of here a better person. That’s not how it works, Neveah. We deserve to live freely with nobody else in control of our own rights, especially you.” -Axel Solace