Meet Mortician. Technically, you don't know her, but her friends call her Joe, and her enemies just start screaming because she's clogged their lungs with sweet, sweet, deliciously painful gases and stolen all their blood while she's at it.

Template by whynotzoidbergdotorg on Tumblr, of course.

Also, she's higher than Gardner on the hypothetical freak-o-meter...waaay higher.