The baleens loosely have three genders, as humans see things. Givers (male), Carriers (female), and Duals (NB/genderfluid).

how do the baleens see gender? Not exactly as fluid, but of the three big groups of baleens, the Mist Desert tends to be in the middle ground towards swapping things around. Just as long as you do your best to look the part. A carrier switching to a giver presentation is fine. But they are still expected to work for and with the community. And this could include still having buds if their family needs it. Givers switching to being carriers have it slightly easier - they can still 'carry' young after they are born, but will need help preparing food from the carrier parent for the babies. Or, something like a nursemaid, when there are situations where buds have been abandoned or the mother had died.

In more supportive families, tusks will often be carved, or harnesses woven, and given as a gift and a sign of acceptance. Or, tusk caps can be carved and made very ornate, to show how loved the member is.
For those who may be kicked out, they consider making their own markers of gender as a show of pride and strength. There are some traveling groups who do their best to pick up 'strays' like this, and help them find their place with other families.