- She/her
HHH IM NOT SURE WHAT TO WRITE YET
-I’m known as Phoenix, Nixi or Auggie
-I refer to myself as we in a funny way as in "we" = "My dumbass and I"
Late Happy Mother's Day Drabble
I wanted to draw something for Mothers day but i'm being slammed by tests and final projects so I wrote a quick drabble within an hour FJIDOAW
CW: mentions of death/passing on
This one is a little bittersweet but its more to be a moving on thing but always loving someone, your parents.
The aroma of red bean and egg, tinged with hints of fresh fruit, filled the air of her apartment. Pyramids of fruits sat on plates on her counter, creating a colorful sight from red to green due to its variety. The scent that slipped out every crack and window, filling every passerby with warmth and a craving for sweets. It was Mother’s Day, so naturally, the smell of flowers lingered in the air outside her apartment, the aroma of her cooking simply adding on to the liveliness of the day.
Yunwen gracefully moved in dance-like motion around the kitchen, moving between the steamer and the stove, making sure nothing was overcooked. Her jade eyes focused on the nian gao within the pan, making sure the egg-coated rice cakes didn’t burn.
As soon as it was done, she skillfully took the rice cakes out with a pair of chopsticks, placing them on a plate neatly to stack them up into another pyramid of food, a smile naturally rising to her face. She truly adored the smell of cooking and baking; the smell wasn’t just a warm or sweet smell, but a smell of home. But that blissful content was only fleeting. She felt her heart drop a little, knowing what the next step was.
It was time to set up the altar and light the candles.
It was all bittersweet. She always refused to believe that her mother was gone. But... after spending so much time with MK, Mei, Sandy, Pigsy, Wukong, and even Macaque (Whom she surprisingly became friends with), she’s learned to accept it. They provided ears she never had. Eyes that she couldn’t see through. Advice that she could’ve never dreamed to take or think of.
They helped her accept her mother was gone. Helped her break her delusion. To let reality finally settle in, finally allowing the hurt to slip into her wounds that she’s gritted through and refused to care for, finally trying to stop the bleeding that has drained her of everything.
But it wasn’t just the pain nor her blood, sweat, and tears she shed for years. It was... the learning experience, really. Learning from the past and present, to prepare for the future. Her friends—something she’s come to genuinely accept—taught her something she never thought about: her mother wasn’t truly gone. She felt that if she stopped trying, stopped her anger, her mother would be gone forever, as if she would be erased from her mind permanently. But that wasn’t it.
Her coping mechanism wasn’t entirely with fault or delusion. Her mother still lived on within her. She still carried her mother's blood, as well as the vague blurry memories of her, and that was all she needed. She still carried the blood of the fenghuang--begrudgingly, celestial blood--but that wasn’t the point nor just it. She had the right idea, but she took it too far.
Thoughts and rambling aside, they taught her to cherish her memory in a past form, as a memory, as part of herself. Not something to force and manipulate into reality as a physical form, all to try to cling to it. Something that was supposed to pass on.
Soon, the plates were set up at the small little altar she made, candles sitting on near the edges of the rosewood table, carved with intricate designs. There was no picture frame, no picture, nothing. She didn’t have a picture of her mother,.. nor did she ever need it. She lit an incense, bowing as she held the fragile stick between her palms, before walking up slowly, sticking the incense stick into the small tray.
Honestly… she thought this whole thing would hurt a lot more. That it would allow the hollowness to devour her whole from the inside out. That salt would rub itself into her wounds. But... funnily enough, it was nothing like that. She felt... lighter like the sky clearing up to reveal its beauty, blue streaked with gradients and lines of various colors. Her shoulders no longer felt heavy, the chains wrapped around her neck and body slipping off got the ground. Her anger at everything and everyone simmering down from its boil.
A small prayer left her mouth before she muttered “母親節快樂.”
She soon stepped back before sitting down on her knees, her behind resting on her heels. She gazed at the altar, her little fenghuang manifesting beside her, curling up around her body. Its white gaze settled on the burning incense, before bowing its head. She sat there, watching the candles and incense, waiting for them to burn out. But she herself didn't burn out. It didn’t hurt. Nothing did for once. Her vision was no longer muddled. Soon, her lips quirked up, a small but genuine smile rising to the edges of her mouth
Maybe she can move on after all