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[AMBIVALENT] 2018 Sketch Log by attributionalternate_emailfusiondescent

posted last year, edited last year

A collection of traditional artwork that I have drawn using a ball point pen during 2018 whilst working at my printer at university. This collection is filled with artwork that has not been uploaded.

This is a 36 page PDF containing over 40 drawings and sketches of monsters, demons, angels, and more...! with some commentary by myself on my thought process and what the drawing is about.

nudity warning (nothing explicit)
slight body horror

bodyhorror fullnudity kofi sketchlog violence

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A Night of KnivesFootsteps. As the city lights turned off around her, a figure paced from roof to roof, waiting for the target. From their visor, she contacts… someone. They’re getting a bit impatient at them. They spit out, “How long am I going to wait? Also, whydya want these kiddos to be put out of commision exactly..?” The figure on the other end of the call gives a slight chuckle, before plainly stating, “Well… it’s quite obvious. The five took down the Gladiator… if they caught wind of our plan then, well…” “But that’s just a hypothetical! They’re just a group of teens who caught a lucky break against an egomaniac, sides, what if they just… don’t know our plan?” The figure on the other end sighs. “They are an unprecedented variable. Simple as that. We can’t let this… variable jeopardize everything.” Before the figure on the roof responds, they notice something. “Actually, hold that thought, doc. We have a target going down the street. What’s his name? The one with the rocket launcher?” “Rowan Thance.” “Ah. Right. Didn’t know he lived here.” The figure tailed the teen from the roofs as he walked to… “Wait- he lives at the cafe? Huh. Oh, right, before I forget, what’s the instructions for this mission?” “I’ve had The Rider spy around town. The five teens are riding high off of their victory, and your recent antics have stirred them to try and save the town from you.” “Oh. Well that’s just swell.” “Ahem. There are two goals. One, there are rumors that the five are taking orders from somebody more knowledgeable. Try to extract that information, would you? Secondly, try to put them out of commission for a bit. Try to avoid other casualties, and outright killing them is optional. Just make them fearful of the forces way above them. That is all.” “I got it. See you on the other side.” Meanwhile, Rowan was taking a stroll around town; he was still getting used to all of the wonders around the place, although he knew he needed to get back to the cafe eventually. When arriving at the location, he managed to see both Sam and Seth exiting the place, and ran up to the two. Seth noticed Rowan first. “Huh, look who it is. Rocket boy himself, how are ya enjoying your home after a few days?” Rowan slightly giggled to himself, “Oh it’s way great! Never seen this many stores at my old place! Also, what’s up with Sam?” “Hm? Oh he’s getting mega-tired. Talked with Mikhail for the whole day, and when he left to retire at his place, spent the rest yappin’ to me. Anyways, he’s goin’ to his place, but as for me? Ima spend a few hours at the skatepark.” The two walked off, Seth motioning a wave to Rowan. Rowan sighed as he walked into the cafe, Stella waving to him. “Hi there! Gonna go to bed?” Rowan shaked his head, “Actually kinda want to spend some time reading- picked up a good book at the library.” “Oh, well keep the light on then. I’m going to my room to pass out, remember to turn the lights off when done!” Before Rowan said anything, she entered her room and closed the door. Leaving Rowan alone, who sat at a far table, near the basement-his room, and began to shift through the pages of his book. The figure saw Rowan enter the cafe and knew that this was the most opportune moment. They jumped down from the roof, and crept their way to the cafe. The ringing of the entrance bells snapped Rowan out of the book. He looked up and saw a dark figure wearing a jacket, barely illuminated as the figure was still in the darkness. They had a hat and were facing down, to not give a hint of their identity away. Rowan muttered to himself quietly, “Crud, didn’t lock the door when I came in,” before speaking in a louder tone; “Um, the cafe is closed, I just live here. Please come back tomorrow..?” The figure breathed heavily, before taking demanding steps towards the boy. “You are Rowan Thance. Correct?” “Y-yeah, wait, how do you know that?” The figure gave a slight laugh. “Good. Glad to know I have the right guy to eliminate..!” The figure took out a scythe and looked up, with their sharp green eyes. They charged at Rowan, but he managed to dodge. “E-eliminate? What do you mean?” Rowan shakily picked up his rocket launcher, as the figure began to wildly swing their scythe to eliminate any obstacles. “Okay… okay Rowan… stay calm. This person wants to kill you, but you can’t lose your cool. What to do…” Rowan was mainly focused on dodging, trying to leave the cramped cafe and into the streets. It was obvious the figure was getting irritated with this cat and mouse game. “Let’s make one thing clear here, honey. You. Can’t. Run. FOREVER.” As Rowan approached the front door, he heard the booming voice of the figure, who charged and pinned him to the concrete of the urban streets. He knew he couldn’t use his weapon in this situation, so he tried everything he could to get the figure off of him, but it wasn’t working. The figure sighed as they held him tighter. “What a disappointment, I mean you took down that megalomaniac warden, yet you crumble like this?” They held the scythe in one hand, but as they were about to swing it… something hit the back of their head. “Get… away from him.” Stella stood at the doorway of the cafe, alerted by the noise the two were making. He held her slingshot in the side. He didn’t have anything dangerous to throw at the assassin, but he had enough to distract them at least. Stella fired another shot, which the figure dodged. Rowan ran up to Stelle, a bit disoriented but nothing too bad. “Th-thanks.” “Who is this guy, Rowan? Why are they trying to attack you?” The figure sighs. “Let’s restart, as we didn’t have a proper introduction. You can simply call me ‘The Specter.’ I have received a request from somebody.” They point the scythe at Rowan. “Eliminate him. I’m not required to elaborate.” Stella looked over to Rowan. His fear was clear, as he was shaking from side to side, yet he held firm. “I would go on a monologue about the choices ya have in this situation, but…” The Specter swung their scythe at their side. “You made your choice already.” The Specter leaped high into the air, and the two dodged to both sides in preparation for the attack. But soon they realized that the assassin was falling much slower than expected. The exposed eye of the Specter’s mask was obviously enjoying their surprise, as they redirected to Rowan. They got a clean slash in, but Rowan was focused. He launched a few rockets in the Specter’s direction, making the assassin lose some focus. Meanwhile, Stella was pestering the Specter with various shots. With sight of Rowan lost, the Specter snapped her gaze onto Stella, and quickly made their way to her. “C-crap-!” Stella grabbed Rowan’s hand and began to run into the city alleyways. Rowan asked, “Where are we going? W-what’s the plan?” Stella dryly replied, “I don’t know, but we need to lose them.” The Specter laughed uproariously. “Haha- okay sure, run as far as you can… the chase is always the best part of a hunt.” After looking behind themselves a few times, the two couldn’t see the assailant anymore. Rowan, after panting a few times, weakly said, “…Did… we… lose them?” “Heh- nah.” Out from a shadow, the scythe came out of nowhere, severely cutting Rowan’s face. “R-Rowan!” Rowan recoiled from the pain, half of his vision being replaced by nothing but blood. He replied, “I’m… fine… we need to win this.” He looked down at the ground with his blurred vision, where a puddle of blood was forming from the wound.Stella nodded, as the Specter marched forward. “Aww, our little kid here still has some fight in him. Unfortunately, it ain’t gonna last.” The taunting made a backing up Rowan mad; he launched a volley of rockets straight down the alley, with Stella providing covering fire. The Specter jumped high, only being hit by a few minor shots from Stella, and kicked straight down. “Yknow,” The Specter quietly said, “I haven’t even revealed every trick up my sleeves.” They turned their scythe around, and with one press of the sigil, it morphed into something else entirely. The two slowly backed off, not knowing what was in store. “Say hello to my little friend.” With the press of a trigger, shotgun-like bullets quickly homed in on the two. Stella quickly got in front of Rowan, to shield him from more harm. Luckily, with the distance, most of the wounds were superficial, but the two now realized that they were at a severe ranged disadvantage. Rowan muttered to Stella, “We need to get to a more open spot- let’s go!” Stella took the lead, dragging the half-blind Rowan back to the cafe’s opening. The Specter changed from the shotgun bullets to something more akin to a burst rifle, firing down the sightline. Given the distance, most missed, but some managed to hit their bodies or legs. When reaching the cafe, the two looked at the alley way, where the bullets were coming from so far away, that the two were confident that they escaped. But the two knew the only way this nightmare would end was if the assassin was knocked out, so the two shot into the darkness of the alley, trying to get a few shots in. Meanwhile, the Specter grew annoyed at this zoning battle, so it came time for another trick. With their mask’s display, they focused long distance at the two. They steadied a shot at Stella, as they knew that they were currently the most agile… and fired a beam, as if the gun were a sniper. Stella couldn’t have reacted to the bullet which went straight through her leg, knocking her to the ground. He tried to get back up, but couldn’t. Rowan, now distracted, wasn’t looking when the Specter ran out of the alley, gun in hand. The Specter fired the gun directly at Rowan’s shoulder, which, given prior scythe slashes, was enough to cut it off completely. Stella and Rowan took a second to realize what had just happened, Rowan completely letting the fear overtake him. Stella tried to reach out to Rowan, but he was knocked out by the Specter’s gun butt. A scatterbrained Rowan, not thinking straight, ran into the cafe, maybe thinking he could bar himself inside the basement. He made it inside, bumping against the far wall, but he was stopped as the Specter launched volley after volley of sharp slashes with their scythe. Rowan slid down the wall, now facing his assailant. He silently sobbed as his inevitable fate consumed his mind. ‘Why did this have to happen?’ he thought. He thought about the journey thus far, his family, his new friends, and the naive thrill of battle. The thought that this type of battle was fun was now laughable. He just braced himself. Not saying a word. Ready for his judgment. The Specter reveled in the pain of their target, getting ready to seal the deal. “Okay buddy, can you do one more favor for me before you get sent to the great beyond? Great.” They coughed. “Some people say that you had a boss of some kind when you defeated the Gladiator. Could you tell me who it was? Oh yeah, also don’t play with me, you ain’t exactly in a position to negotiate.” Rowan, with nothing to lose at this point, weakly coughed. “y-yeah. his… his name is… mik..hail knal…a” The Specter stepped back. “Mi-Mikhail?” Obviously, they weren’t expecting that answer, but composed herself. “Well honey…” The Specter took off her mask, ready for Rowan to look at their killer. “This is the end of the line for you.” She put it back on, before deeply slashing his chest, near the heart. The Specter continued to do this, nearly killing him, but stopped. They looked back, and examined the darkness with their mask’s display. They could see somebody else coming. “Hm. Well, he’s as good as dead anyway. I should escape while I have the opportunity.” The Specter slipped away into the darkness, unseen by any prying eyes. “Hey, the cafe’s lights are still on. Is he still reading that book?” Seth rode into town from the skatepark. He slowly skated to the cafe, but immediately braked. “Woah- what the fu…” He was speechless at what he saw. Broken windows, blood everywhere, two unconscious bodies, and an arm lying in the middle of it all. The scene looked straight out of a horror movie. “Wh-What..? Holy shit are they okay!?” Seth quickly rode into the scene, first checking on Stella. He examined her body, but luckily the bullet to the leg was the only thing really damaging. He then changed his attention to Rowan. He walked into the broken cafe, and when he saw the body, Seth had to look away. He could hear Rowan’s labored breathing, but his wounds were hard to look at. They were grievous to say the least. “No, no, no… he’s probably gonna die if I don’t do something… shit!” Seth’s brain was overstimulated at what to do. “No… I can’t get Valeria. They’re at their village and I can’t get there in time… I need Mikhail. Okay, where’s that warehouse thing…” Seth skated out, and quickly made it to the warehouse. He knocked on the door very rapidly, needing a response now. Mikhail tiredly walked out of his technology-filled room. “Who… is it? Oh, Mr. Begonsa, what do you ne-“ Seth quickly got to the point. “I need you, quick. I-it’s Stella and Rowan, they’re hurt… bad!” Mikhail suddenly woke up from his tiredness. “W-what? Where are they?” He quickly pulled out his medical briefcase. “Cafe; come quick!” The two made it to the scene quickly. Mikhail quickly got to work, creating an autopsy for the two before reporting back to Seth. “Okay… jesus. Listen. Stella’s wounds are mostly superficial; I should be able to heal her with my medical gun. However Rowan is obviously more wounded, and will need a proper operation. Take Rowan to my base, I will heal Stella. You can choose to alert your friends.” “…Got it.” Seth ran over to Rowan, and picked him up. He could hear his soft yet labored breathing, and he was cold to the touch. He couldn’t skate back to base with a wounded body, so he quickly marched to the base. A single thought permeated through the skater's mind. “Who did this?”