Rip to people who saw my crashout journal (deleted now) lmao but in all seriousness, things were bad. Things are still a lil tight so...what's good? Well, I'm incredibly blessed that my art can still save me, that even in this ai hellscape, I'm still desirable enough that people will buy me bread so I can keep doing what I'm doing. That makes me feel worthy.
Before all this started, my brother offered to take me to megacon ....which was a bit of anxiety nightmare. Literal biggest con I've ever been to but I was determined! While my brother and his friend where there to see some of the celebs, there was only one dude who was a celebrity to me. Tim (the GOAT) Jacobus. The fucking LEGEND behind the original goosebumps covers. :'D I just feel so bad they shoved him all the way in the back and it was hard to find his booth....I also felt a lil bad that a lil prior to meeting him, due to staff negligence (guiding me to a deadend path while I was having an anxiety attack) where I almost blacked out...^^;' I was a lil pale and disheveled when I actually got to meet him but he was so nice dude. Normally I don't care about typical celebs, the people who are famous to me are often smaller artists. Aside from that, I spent a bit of time collecting weird japanese gasha because I love gashapon machines (the weirder the offerings, the better).
(now if only I can meet R.L.Stine and Walter Wick aaaa
Skip skip skip cause after the con I got very sick and nearly had organ failure and that's not good skip. Along with people buying comms that have helped me stay afloat, I also had enough for a new bed. As silly as it sounds, I felt some emotions cause I haven't had a new bed since I was a child and it feels nice to be sleeping on something that isn't V shaped.
Anywho, that's all for now
I've wanted to try new stuff this year and so I have, part of that exploration was Sheezy..... So what are my thoughts? It's slower, smaller and fits exactly the nostalgia I was seeking but I think in doing so, it's shown me an issue with myself. I don't want to sound up my own ass or anything but I'm certainly not the spasmodic IZ loving amateur I once was. Part of my old dA experience was being tied to a fandom, having a group of similarly skilled peers who were growing along side me and while I could always join another fandom and there's also always room for people to grow ...... I more or less just feel alone. What I'm saying is I could go gung ho and rp like it's 2010 but it's not. I have my own original thing now that I'm very passionate about and pour most of my time into. When I left dA, when I felt betrayed by most of my old friends, I turned my back on all of it and saw being professional as the only way forward so worked so hard to break into a difficult industry and only seems to be collapsing now. :'D I also kinda feel like the site prefers a certain demographic and I'm probably not it. This isn't really the doing of Sheezy of course.
All very downer shit, I know....uh...so what about the good?
I really like the vibe, can I say that enough? I love seeing the personality in all the customized pages I pass. The people here who are larping like it's 2012 and keeping that artstyle alive? I wanna kiss you guys on the forehead. That's not to mention I can discover so many amazing artists and know what I am seeing is real human made art! The antiAI stance is a breath of fresh air! I also have never NEVER been on a website with such an active and personable staff. On dA you could barely get a hold of a mod if someone stole your art. And having a direct line to these people on discord? it's the future truly lmao.
Like a leaf on the wind, I suppose I'll see where the future takes me but I'm not leaving anytime soon.
-Gij
Hey there!
My name is Gij and I've been and internet denizen for over a decade (awful I know
jk jk. I'm just really sick of the algorithmic hellscape of twitter and dA polluting itself with ai and rampant art theft. I miss a simpler time before social media stripped itself of all its social features and really just want a cozy place to share my art.
So uh, hi lmao