hello, i have neglected to post a regular ol journal entry here for a while ^~^” been preoccupied with commissions which i have thankfully been on a pretty good streak of receiving lately which i am eternally grateful for!

however i think with the frequency of commissioned art i have been doing i haven’t had much time or energy to put into personal stuff at a similar frequency like i used to, plus my recent complacency in my art style (and a need to keep it consistent for the sake of client work) has been putting an unsatisfying strain on my ambition. which is a little disappointing for me unfortunately! when “garden of you”, a piece i made in the bygone era of 2023, got the sheezy spotlight for a hot minute (which by the way, thank you SO SO MUCH FOR THE SPOTLIGHT AND ALL THE KIND WORDS) it reminded me of my older rendering styles and the love i had for my ocs to try something that normally wouldn’t take off far on Social Media™️ and now i feel like i just. dont do that anymore (or as often as i like). i love making fanart a lot! but i also feel like i’ve been pigeonholing myself into safety and consistency is what im trying to get at :,) which is a result of me committing most of my braincells to completing commissioned art as efficiently and cleanly as i can!

i dont wanna sound like im complaining abt my influx of commissions i’ve gotten recently. again i am super duper grateful of all the support since its more than i ever thought id get!! ^~^ buuuut i am starting to feel why i was put off from relying on commissions as a primary source of income for a very long time.

i opened commissions after years of putting it off bc i’ve been failing at landing even the most middle of the road service jobs and i needed money. and i believe i mentioned it before but recently i fumbled a super ideal position and my morale kinda went down in general.

at least i got art commissions right? a fairly decent stream of them to boot! but then the cycle of “committing artistic energies into client work than my own personal practice” repeats and i feel like i am gonna lose steam by the time artfight roles around!! no!!!!!!!!

so ALLLL that is to say: i am probably gonna raise my commission prices by around june (a more detailed breakdown in a much more streamlined journal post will be made once i crunch the numbers). i’ve been reluctant since i want my art services to be accessible to those with smaller budgets, but also hmm i feel like i have hit my stride with garnering interest in commissions (at least over on vgen) and can possibly raise them at this point. i dont think it’ll be by too much (i do not think im at the level where i can get away with charging 100+ for a single character illust) but again stay tuned for the detailed price breakdown once i get around to it. and generally get my shit together. aaaaa

SO ANYWAY. that’s what i’ve been going through. i just finished the school year and i planned to commit summer to both artfight (super excited btw) and commissions if i wasn’t able to get a job, but idk this may shift now that i’ve been committed to the grind for a little less than half a year. if you read this far thank you for hearing me out :,) im doing pretty fine im just. conflicted about my current sitch. LOL