- she/her
I'm SoftenStar! But you can call me Audrey. :3
idk I feel like writing a life update journal. Might be long, idk.
So while not new, I've definitely slowed down on art lately. |D I am trying to get back into drawing more again, but it's been a very stressful month for me so drawing has sadly been a low priority. I did at least get some character bio concept doodles done, but I wish I had gotten some bio pictures done too.
Anyways, cat update time. Tiger officially has stage three kidney disease, and like I previously mentioned only has months to live. It's been stressful and an adjustment to deal with. Some days he's fine and seems like he's doing well, while others he seems like he's sick. It doesn't help that we've had trouble with his phosphorus binder and getting him to eat his renal food (plus he seems to have some nausea and the medicine for that makes his mouth foam...idk it sucks). Thankfully we've gotten better at giving him his subcutaneous fluids, but that takes three of us to get it done (idk how the vets in all those videos get cats to sit still because Tiger does not).
It's definitely been a learning experience, and I've found a lot of great resources for renal cats online. However, I occasionally run into conflicting information, such as whether or not the current phosphorous binder is good/safe (most people online recommended it and the vet said it was okay but other sources say it's not???). It's also difficult to determine whether he gets nauseous because of the binder, high phosphorus levels, an upset stomach, or just because of his kidney disease.
So yeah...some days I feel like he's doing okay, and other days he won't be and I'll be stressing out about it at work. ;_; It's always on my work days too, and the weekends when most of the vets are closed.
Nina is still doing okay, but her medicine doses are slowing down, and her cat asthma is kinda getting more visible again. She can't stay on this medicine forever and will have to be off of it awhile once these doses are over before she can start it again. Her asthma attacks still terrify me, but outside that and her being mostly deaf she seems fine.
idk watching my childhood cats get old and deal with terminal health problems has been heartbreaking to say the least. ;_; I'd do anything to turn them into younger, healthier cats again but I know that's not possible. The worst part is that I feel guilty about Tiger's kidney disease. I wonder how long this had been going on. Would it be in a lower stage if we had caught it sooner? idk I just feel so guilty that we only noticed it when it almost killed him.
Anyways, I need to talk about other things or this journal is just going to be nothing but sad stuff.
I've been playing Digimon Story Cyber Sleuth: Hacker's Memory. I thought I played the original only two years ago but apparently it's been four years. |D It's really good! I really enjoyed the first game, and this one added more Digimon (though my party is very similar to my Cyber Sleuth one lol). At first I wasn't sure about the story, but I'm enjoying it a lot now that I've gotten 10 chapters into the game. I still think the first game's story is more iconic, but Hacker's Memory's story gets pretty good.
I was kinda sad that I couldn't play as a girl though, especially since you could in the previous game. However, the protagonist's friend Yu is definitely in love with him. You cannot convince me otherwise. So I guess I can excuse the lack of a female protagonist since there's a gay element here (with that said, the next Digimon Story RPG better let me play as a girl! >:U ).
Speaking of games, the Game Awards are coming up soon, and I've recently realized I've barely played any games from this year. |D Only Unicorn Overlord, Princess Peach: Showtime!, Another Code: Recollection, and the Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door remake...and the latter two are remakes. God if I had to pick a favorite from those, it would probably be Paper Mario, but that's sort of cheating since the original is one of my favorite games of all time. Otherwise, I guess Unicorn Overlord would be my favorite from this year??
But if we're talking favorite games I've played this year in general (including games released outside of 2024) it would probably be Rhapsody II. idk that game has flaws but playing it was pure serotonin to me.
While I doubt I'll be done with Digimon before this, Infinity Nikki releases early next month! I'm ready to see what the devs have been cooking for this one. B-) The mobile games are fun, but this game's teaser trailer is what made me interested in the series to begin with so I hope it delivers!
I do feel kinda bad for anyone who thinks it will be a cozy game though. ^^; Don't get me wrong, I'm sure it will be very cozy. However, the Nikki games have some pretty messed up stuff going on underneath the cute fashion battles and I doubt Infinity Nikki will be any different.
As for anime, I don't have a lot to say about anything I'm watching. Dandadan has been pretty fun though (you just gotta get past the first episode and its...sensitive themes. idk anyone planning to watch should look up a content warning first). Episode 7 was surprisingly heartbreaking, and the animation has been high quality throughout.
Other than that, the other seasonal anime I'm enjoying the most are Acro Trip and Puniru is a Kawaii Slime. Acro Trip is pretty silly and I wish it would get more than 12/13 episodes because it took the protagonist too long to get her powers. |D idk I want the manga!! It's finished and it's five volumes...I just need one of those manga publishing cowards to pick up the rights for it. Puniru is pretty fun too. It has a few things I don't like, but overall it's pretty charming and has some very fun animation.
One thing about working more and watching seasonal anime is that I'm really struggling to watch anything else. It's taken me like 7 months to watch half of Record of Lodoss War....and I think I'm gonna need to rewatch most of it before I finish it. ;_; There's a lot anime in my backlog that I want to watch, but somehow I got sucked into watching seasonals. I really need an anime season with no shows I want to watch, but there always seems to be a few anime that interest me every season (one time it was like 13...never again. |D ).
Anime backlog....video game backlog....character bio backlog...my life is nothing but endless backlogs I try and fail to complete. Technically I have a movie/tv show backlog too...and a manga/book backlog. idk too many things.
idk adulthood continues to be a struggle. Would be really cool if someone could prove the Republicans stole the election and get the results changed. 👀 Like that would improve my life big time. Surely some computer whiz out there can find evidence?
Seriously though, the voting machines in the swing states were run by Starlink, and now the guy who owns that is going to have a government position??? Does anyone else think that's as suspicious as hell???? God I wish the Democrats would challenge things instead of sitting there and letting this happen.
idk that's just a theory....a game theory
After a stressful few days, Tiger is finally home.
https://x.com/SoftenStar/status/1856029733227553176/photo/1
It's so nice to have him back. ;o; I missed him so much.
He has a ton of meds that he's going to need. He also has to be on a different cat food for the rest of his life, and I guess Nina can't be on that food since she doesn't have renal problems (that we know of) so now we need to figure out how we're going to deal with that. |D We've always fed them together and given them the same food, but now we're going to have to closely monitor that. We can't even leave either food (wet or dry) out because it would be bad if the other cat ate it. Honestly, I wish we would get Nina's blood tested because maybe we could find out if the food would be okay for her, but idk if my parents feel that way.
We did unfortunately learn that Tiger probably only has 6 months to live. I'm just hoping we can make it a good six months for him. It's going to hurt, but I suppose it will be easier to prepare for when I know it's coming.
I'm hoping this will be the last update on this story for awhile. ;w; I'm just really glad he's back.
I have an update on my last post to share.
The vet called this morning and said that Tiger is doing really good. They said he's eating a lot and has been very vocal. If things stay this way he'll be able to come home sometime tomorrow. He'll have to be on a special food for the rest of his life (which means Nina will have to also) but apparently he's eating it at the vet so hopefully he'll eat it here too (these cats are pickier than me when it comes to food lol and I'm mega picky)
So while we're not 100% sure things will be okay, things are at least leaning on the positive side. I think they're going to update us later today too. He has to stay there at least through part of Monday but I miss having him around so much. ;o; He usually sits on the couch behind me, but day he isn't there and I've been sad. I'm hoping he'll be able to come home tomorrow.
I was crying when I wrote my previous post, but I cannot stress enough how serious this was. When my parents brought him to the vet last night, he was in a terrible state. If we had waited any longer to bring him into the vet, he definitely would have died. Very few vets are open in town during the weekend, in fact the one he's at now way over in the other side of town (our usual one is closed on weekends). The emergency vet is open on weekends, but in my experience that place has a very long wait, so I'm thankful that the vet he's at was able to see him yesterday.
I also thought it was just a stomach bug and that it would go away. Both cats have had stomach bugs in the past and they've usually gone away on their own (probably only brought them to a vet for that once or twice). However, this kidney problem would never go away on its own.
I'm hoping I'll be able to post tomorrow that Tiger will be coming home. ;w; Things are looking better so I'm hoping they stay that way. Thank you everyone who sent me kind messages. :heart: I'm feeling better after hearing the news this morning. Let's hope things keep improving.
So you know how in my last post I said that my cat Tiger has been doing okay? Well, turns out that's not the case at all.
The past few days, he's barely eaten, and whenever he does eat he ends up throwing it back up. My parents ending up bringing him into the vet today while I was at work, and we learned that he has kidney issues. They're keeping him there for a few days to hopefully help with that, and if things go well he'll be back late Monday with a special diet and medicine probably.
However, there's also a chance he won't come back home.
I'm really hoping things will be okay, but he's an 18 year old cat. There's a chance he won't recover.
The worst part was having to be at work and waiting to find out the results. I was on break when I found out my parents were bringing him to the vet, and I spent the last 4 and half hours of my shift filled with anxiety and dread. Maybe I could have asked to leave early, but I didn't want to be a bother. It was a similar situation when Nina went to the vet last week where I spend my entire shift filled with dread, but this time that dread extends through my days off where I have to sit and wait to find out if Tiger will get to come back home.
To think I petted him this morning and kissed his forehead, and that might be the last time I ever see him...
Between this, Nina's medical problems, and the election, I really am not feeling okay right now. I apologize if I'm not very active (not that I am already but still). idk things really suck right now...I'm hoping I'll have a happy update to give in the next few days but for now I'm filled with complete dread
(also thank you to everyone who's left kind comments on my previous posts. I apologize that I haven't responded to anyone of them but I really appreciate the kind words ;w; )
This is that post with "better vibes" that I promised in the last journal. This is more of a general update journal but hopefully it's just nicer than the last one.
Anyways, I think I need to give an update on a previous journal (https://sheezy.art/softenstar/journal/cats ) since I was pretty emotional while writing it. Sorry for taking so long to update on that.
So previously I expressed concerns over my cat Nina's health. Well, we brought she into the vet and learned that she has a bronchial obstruction in her chest and lungs. It's likely due to her age and cannot be cured. We did, however, get medicine to help her a little. The options for that were a cat inhaler that costs $400 a month, a liquid medicine that goes in her mouth, or a small liquid that goes in her ear. We chose the latter since it's the least stressful for everyone. She can't be on the medicine forever, but we will be able to get a few refills (however she does need to go off of the medicine for a bit before we can start it up again once we're done with these doses.
She is still getting her scary wheezing/asthma episodes, but they seem to be less frequent and she seems to be doing better. There was a weird moment yesterday where her right eye was watery though and I still haven't figured out if that's related to any of this (it's not one of the medicine side effects).
Tiger is still doing good as far as I'm aware. He goes in for a general checkup in December so hopefully we won't hear any bad news there. He still has a heart murmur and I hope he's not negatively affected by that.
Anyways, I beat Atelier Rorona DX recently. I love Atelier games. It's fun to be a silly alchemist and slowly learn new recipes and become stronger. Rorona is one of the time limit games, meaning that you only have so much in-game time to complete tasks. You can't do and see everything in a single playthrough, but that's what new game plus is for! One day I'll do one...hopefully my backlog will be smaller then. The time limit was pretty easy at first, but later on it became pretty stressful since everything makes time pass and you only get 90 days per task.
I missed one of the last events to the character whose ending I wanted because the time for the assignment I was doing was ending and I got sad. |D But I wouldn't have gotten his ending anyways since I only got the requirements for the normal ending and not the good ending. Still sad.
Overall it was a fun game, but there is some weird anime nonsense not present in the newer games (did Astrid really need to ask Rorona to call her "Big sister"??? that's so weird). The dub wasn't bad though and I'm sad that they stopped dubbing the games.
I also finally beat Yo-Kai Watch 2. I played it back when it released, got to the final boss, lost, and didn't play it again until now (same thing happened with Dragon Quest VII, which I also finally beat earlier this year). I leveled up my Yo-Kai a bit, relearned the game mechanics since I kinda forgot them, and then somehow beat the boss despite struggling. I do wish I had beaten it back in the day though since the ending would have had more impact if the story was fresher in my mind, but overall it was good.
It hurts that this franchise is stuck on the 3DS and all of its games are out of print and expensive. I still regret not pre-ordering the third game. ;_; I had no idea it would have such a limited print. I had to settle for a digital copy since I'm not shelling out $400+ for a physical, but I couldn't update it do to lack of space on my SD card so that sucks (hopefully the update didn't fix any bugs otherwise I'm screwed). I tried to bid on one of the blasters spinoffs on ebay earlier this week and at first I was winning, but I was very quickly outbid.
If the Switch 2 brings back the dual-screen, I really hope these games get revived. Everyone needs to play Yo-Kai Watch and fall in love with Komasan.
...Speaking of the Switch 2, Nintendo recently confirmed that it will be backwards compatible with the Switch. Good, because I keep buying Switch games. I hope the new console has lots of color options. I want pink...or something like the galaxy New 3DS XL (I love mine lol it's so pretty). They're apparently still announcing the Switch 2 this fiscal year so I'm ready. Show it to me now.
Seriously though I want a dual-screen switch. Maybe find a way to make the dual screen optional so that games that need it can work and games that don't also can.
Back to games...I've been playing Tomodachi Life the past few days. |D So much for my backlog... It's sort of a comfort game?? It's weird how the Miis of my OCs are in their 20's though...like no Sketches you're supposed to be 15 not 27 skfaldffhaslidfh. I'd love a new version of this game, preferably with a larger Mii limit because 100 is not enough for me. I could easily fill that with my human OCs alone.
Speaking of human OCs, originally I was trying to make a concept art sheet for each one, but recently I've just been doodling them all on one sheet to hopefully speed things up. Here's a preview: https://www.deviantart.com/stash/01f9p1930nxu
Note: Heights are not accurate and clothing might change. Some colors will probably change too
idk maybe something like this will speed up my bio pictures? Or maybe not. XD idk we'll see. I got way too many human OCs and I want to get their bios done (at least the main ones for this story).
Otherwise, I don't have much else to mention. There are like 3 magical girl anime besides Precure airing this anime season though and they're all fun in their own ways. Acro Trip is my favorite one, though I wish that the main character got to do more "evil" (maybe she will soon??). Outside of magical girl anime, Dandadan is pretty freaking good (just maybe look up a content warning for that first episodes though before you watch).
idk hopefully the vibes were better in this post than the last. It really is getting cold outside and it's already dark but 5pm...god I hate Autumn...Spring can't get here soon enough...