- she/they
when 1 world ends, the next one comes alive
Do you ever feel like a bad person for liking a piece of media from a problematic or controversial person/company? I've been feeling this way ever since mid 2025 with Nintendo and Pokémon games. I love Nintendo and Pokémon games, and I enjoy playing them. But every once in a while I'll start to feel like a jerk for playing them. I feel like I'm enabling something bad. I know Nintendo's gained a bad reputation for their anti-consumer practices and constant DMCA takedowns over the last couple of years, and between the lackluster quality of some of their newer games and all that drama with Palworld over the last year and a half, I know a lot of people aren't happy with Pokémon either. I know I can't defend those things. I know they aren't right. I'm not going to pretend that I'm not frustrated as well. I know Nintendo and Pokémon are capable of making awesome games, and I wish they'd focus more on that than the endless frivolous lawsuits. I think they can, and should, do better; not just for themselves, but for their fans too.
Sure, I could make a bunch of excuses to rationalize me liking/owning their consoles and games, but I know it's not going to make me feel better. I can ignore blind and mindless hate, but it's a lot harder to ignore valid criticism. Plus, it's not as easy to believe that there's nothing wrong with liking or consuming something when you've got thousands of people all over the internet insisting that not only is said thing evil or morally wrong, but you're a bad person too for liking/consuming it.
So yeah, does anyone ever feel this way sometimes? I'm not used to being in a situation like this and the cognitive dissonance is killing me.
I've been taking some long scrolls down memory lane on Bluesky in the past couple of weeks and I've been thoroughly reminded of why I left in the first place. While there are still a couple of things I miss about that place, and I'll always keep the good memories in my heart, going back brought back a lot of bad memories and reminded me of some of the reasons why I left.
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The constant doomscrolling really fucked with my mental health, and made it impossible for me to focus on important things in my own life, like chores or schoolwork.
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There was (and still is) FAR too much doomerism, defeatism, fearmonering and insufferable/terminally online people there. It was really demoralizing and frustrating. I was also disgusted to see so many people spread blatant misinformation just for clout. I don't enjoy being on social media as much when I have to block 10 people every time I log in. Don't get me wrong, there are also a lot of cool people there who I still respect, but it got hard to focus on enjoying them with so many douchebags around.
I'm still trying to wean myself off of the site entirely, but it's a little hard to let go. It's not easy finding a predominately left-leaning site these days, and like I said, there are still plenty of people there I respect and wish the best of luck to. But the more I go back, the less regret I have for leaving. I'll make sure that today will be the last day I go back there.
Happy New Year! It's still 2025 where I live, so I just want to get some thoughts out before 2026 comes around.
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I can comfortably say that this year was one of the worst years I've ever had to live through, if not the absolute worst. 2016 and 2020 were rough, but nowhere near this bad. Thankfully, me and my family haven't had to suffer too much this year, but it doesn't make me happy knowing so many others around the world weren't so lucky. Very little good came out of this year, and the way things are looking now, 2026 might be even worse. But, I still have just a little optimism. Why? Because I refuse to give into apathy and cynicism. I don't blame people for feeling pessimistic and even a little doomerish with the way things have been going for the past 5 years, but I just want people to remember that things aren't always going to be like this. Everything may suck now, but it doesn't have to suck forever. Humanity has made it through many tough times before, and we can still do it today. Giving up won't solve anything, and there are too many people who care about me and too many things I believe in for me to do so. Better things are possible, and I want to work as hard as I can to make them a reality. I still have faith that there are many people out there like me who not only believe in the possibility of a better world, but want to work to make it happen, and I sincerely hope we can start doing so in 2026. Maybe it's just my endless optimism; maybe I'm just huffing hopium, but that's what I believe.
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On a less depressing note, I'm turning 20 next year, and I have a lot of plans to better myself as a person by then. I haven't really been happy with myself as a person in the past 5 years, so this is the perfect opportunity to fix myself. I've written them down so I can see how many of my goals I've managed to accomplish by my 20th birthday.
That's all I've got to say. I hope 2026 is a better year for you :)